Thursday, March 26, 2009

Be gentle. Play nicely.

Sometimes I wish I didn't care so much.  Really.  I wish I could blow things off and just say "that's just they way she is" or "I don't care what they think."  But the reality is, I'm a pleaser.  It bothers me when I hear through the grapevine that someone said something crappy or unkind about me.  I lose sleep.  

And if I hear that they said something about Piglet, well forget it. Then I'm kind of pissed.  Actually, I'm really pissed.  And hurt.  I mean, bag on me, but leave my kid out of it.  I know he's not perfect and after all, I coined the term "Shrieker" but that's to be used at my discretion.  Piglet is challenging but he's also sweet, funny, full of personality, and most importantly, he's mine and I would not trade him for any other baby in the world.  

Not even one that SLEEPS THROUGH THE NIGHT.  

That's right. Even if your child possesses the Holy Grail of all baby qualities, I still would NOT trade your child for my Piglet.  

One thing I've learned from being a mother is you just cannot pass judgement on another mother until you have literally mothered the same child.  And by the same, I mean genetically identical.  My best friend gave me great advice before I had Piglet (she's so good that way).  She said "don't listen to anything that anyone else tells you.  You have to do what works for you."  So along that vein - maybe you don't agree with my parenting style or (gasp!) that I let him sleep with me -that's right, IN MY FREAKING BED Y'ALL, but it's really not for you to say. Don't judge me. 


Unless I call you every day and night and complain about my child and sleep deprivation and how challenging he is, don't start with me. Don't go there.  And don't dish about it to anyone else either.  That's just plain uncalled for.  And God-willing if we are fortunate enough to have another baby, don't trash talk that kid either.  When it comes to kids, just leave them out of it. Please. 

Do what we're always asking our kids to do - be gentle, play nicely.

Please don't make me lose more sleep - I don't get much as it is.  


Joy said...

Oh my this post! So well said and such a great point. I've had to limit my time with certain "friends" due to their criticisms and constant comparisons to my children. Each person's situation is different and as you said...each child is different. Have I ever mentioned that I wish we lived closer?

Anonymous said...

Some people just act like they are in toilet all the time.
They can only see what is in front of them, but they have no idea how ugly its getting under theirs own ass.
I wish you can let that person get easy out of your mind and out of your heart.

You are great Mother and Piglet is Great Baby.

Love you!!! xoxox
(it doesnot let me leave comment!!!!, trying again!)

Marketing Mama said...

Hmmm... you sound a *bit* worked up over this. I would be pissed, too. Can you just stay far, far away from whatever bitch was talking trash?

There's this phrase I love that talks about "not letting people live in our head rent-free." Essentially, you aren't getting anything good out of obsessing over this or letting thoughts of them rule your mind. Try to let it go. You are so the better person here.

Cameron said...

Oh, so sorry to hear about this! I've spent time myself laying awake at night and "letting people live rent-free" in my head. It's miserable! I hope that you can learn to let things slide off your back! :) Unfortunately I think that being a mom makes you a target for trash-talking, and being a super great mom with gorgeous Sweets Tables at birthday parties makes you an even bigger target! Underachievers really hate overachievers. :) Try to remember that when people talk about you (or Piglet) it's more about THEM than YOU. :)